


The Interview

by DatoPotato



Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Batfamily (DCU)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-14
Updated: 2020-04-14
Packaged: 2021-03-01 23:48:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23655637
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DatoPotato/pseuds/DatoPotato
Summary: In light of current events, here's a fic about Clark and Bruce having an interview via video call and the kids get up to their regular shenanigans.
Comments: 16
Kudos: 178





	The Interview

“Bruce, can you hear me?” Clark asked on the other end of the video call.

Bruce nodded. “Loud and clear, Clark.”

Clark smiled and cleared his throat. “Right, well let’s get started then.”

Clark flipped through some papers in front of him and adjusted his glasses. As he looked up at his screen, movement behind Bruce caught his eye. Upon closer inspection, it was Dick walking past Bruce’s study, holding a bowl of cereal. As he passed, he peeked inside and when his eyes met Clark’s, they went wide as he sprinted off. 

“Clark, if you’re not prepared, perhaps we should conduct the interview later.” Bruce smirked and raised an eyebrow at Clark.

Clark shook his head, chuckling to himself. “No, I’m ready. Shall we?” Bruce hummed in acknowledgement. “So is Wayne Foundation planning any special efforts during this difficult time?”

Bruce leaned back in his seat. “Yes, as I’m sure you’re aware, the company is doing everything in its power to create a vaccine but we aren’t planning on forgetting the current and immediate needs of the citizens,” Bruce started but Clark was soon distracted by Dick carefully opening the door and stepping inside. He walked awkwardly into the frame while occasionally glancing behind him, out the door.

Jason ambled into the room, a long, red velvet cloak trailing behind him and a, no doubt priceless antique crown sat atop his head. He held his head high as he surveyed the study behind Bruce who continued talking about the different efforts the foundation was making. Jason seemed pleased with what he saw as he motioned for someone else to come in. Tim entered, wearing a medieval armour helmet. He held his hands out in front of him, Clark couldn't imagine it was easy for him to see through the helmet.

“And that’s just scratching the surface of what the foundation is contributing during these trying times,” Bruce finished, catching Clark’s attention.

“Ah, right,” Clark stumbled, “uh, what about the people on the streets, those without homes?”

Bruce started again as Clark did his best to take notes down while also being completely distracted by the scene behind Bruce. Tim had gotten down on one knee and held his right fist over his heart as he kept his head pointed to the floor. Jason stood regally before him as Dick fell into a deep bow and pulled out a long sword from behind him and handed it to Jason.

Clark choked and Bruce raised a brow. “Clark, are you all right?”

Clark nodded as he attempted to regain his composure. “Yes, sorry, Bruce. Please go on.”

Bruce furrowed his brows before dismissing it and continuing to talk about the homeless relief plan. Behind him, Dick’s face nearly broke as Jason took the sword and proceeded to knight Tim. They began to change positions before Duke’s head poked into the room and he made wild arm motions. Dick, Jason and Tim all scrambled to get out as quietly as possible, disappearing out the door. A moment later, Alfred entered a tray with tea on it. After handing it to Bruce, he left as well.

Clark shook his head, making a mental note to tell Bruce about it another day. He figured it was over. It was not. A few minutes later, four people covered in white sheets began to move eerily around the room behind Bruce. 

“And how’re supplies going over there?” Clark asked, putting his hand over his mouth to hide his smile, “I know over here people are definitely panicking.”

Bruce gave Clark a blank stare. “Clark, this is Gotham, we’ve seen worse.”

After about a minute of that, Damian walked past the study, seeing the four white sheets walking about the room. The sheets all froze as Damian appeared to have a standoff with all four of them. Damian opened his mouth to tell his father but all four sheets charged at the poor boy and bulldozed him out of the study.

Clark began choked again as he tried to cover his laughter. “Clark, are you sure you’re well enough to do this?” Bruce huffed.

Clark nodded as he made a show of drinking some water. “Please continue, Bruce.”

Bruce nodded slowly as he went on. The four boys returned for a victory lap, having subdued Damian and tied him to a kitchen chair which Duke, Jason, Dick and Tim all hoisted above their heads. They all left but quickly returned, awkwardly filing into the study one by one. They stood side by side and then Duke turned to Jason, and Tim turned to Dick as they began to slow dance, though Clark wasn’t sure if he could call it that. The two pairs stood as far away from each other and swayed back and forth. Clark tried very hard to look as though he was just so interested in what Bruce was saying until the realization hit him like a wall of kryptonite: awkward middle school dance. 

Clark covered his mouth again as he spoke, afraid he’d break if he didn’t. “So, how do you feel about how people are reacting to the virus?”

The boys stopped dancing, Dick and Jason both got on one knee as Duke climbed onto Jason’s shoulders and Tim got on Dick’s shoulders. Dick and Jason stood up carefully, Tim and Duke holding their arms out for extra balance before turning to each other, arms braced. Tim and Duke were soon wrestling the other, all the while, Jason and Dick trying to keep the boys on their shoulders. The boys seemed to hear something from the hall as they all froze before scrambling off of shoulders and out of the study. 

Bruce sighed. “All in all, it’s completely ridiculous to panic, people should be taking this seriously, and panicking will do nothing but create chaos and the world has enough of that.”

Clark nodded, clearing his throat and checking his papers. “For sure, and what about your boys?”

Bruce cocked his head. “What do you mean?”

“Well, how’re they handling this?” 

Bruce sighed and shook his head, “I mean, it’s certainly not easy for anyone to be stuck in the house all day, though it’s definitely more comfortable here than most other places.” Bruce paused, thinking for a moment. “They’ve actually been getting along quite well lately, it’s really quite--”

From behind Bruce, Dick fell from the ceiling with a loud crash as Jason dove to catch him, however, he only served to cushion Dick’s fall.

“Ow,” Jason and Dick groaned in unison.

Bruce was up from his desk as he stared at the two boys, “What the hell are you two doing? What were you thinking?” Bruce shouted. 

“Get your fat ass off me, Dickhead,” Jason groaned as the two boys got up, rubbing bruises that had begun to form.

From the doorway, Clark could see Duke and Tim cringe as they both attempted to make a break for it before Bruce caught them. It was too late.

“Timothy and Duke, you better get yourselves back here this instant,” Bruce called. The two other boys shuffled in the room, heads lowered as Bruce went on. “Just one hour of peace, please,” he begged them.

Alfred was in the room with a medical kit, assuming the worst when he heard the commotion and began tending to the two older boys as Bruce continued to plead with them to keep them quiet. 

From his laptop, Clark chuckled. “I see you’re kept busy, at least.”

Bruce sighed heavily and ran a hand down his face, “I love my boys dearly, but I will say, I will be very glad when this is over.”

———————————

Bonus!

Clark was conducting an interview with Mayor Morrisroe as Jon entered his office, “Dad, I’m having some issues with--” Jon looked up and saw his dad on his laptop and his eyes went wide. He thought about apologizing, but he didn’t want to interrupt any more than he already had. So he opted to lean back and softly hit the floor so he could army crawl out of the room, however, that’s not exactly how it happened.

As Jon leaned back, he realized he hadn’t anticipated gravity as he fell backwards and hit the floor. Jon groaned, “Oops.” 

Clark turned around, “Jonathan! Are you all right?” he worried over his boy, “Apologies Mr. Mayor, one moment,” he said to his laptop as he helped his son up.


End file.
